I am prone to laughing fits. Crying, can't breath, hiccups - full on fits of laughter. I actually enjoy these moments. Crazy, manic slices of me. Just me. I'm not sure what is so appealing about them. The sense of giddiness, euphoric endorphin rush? The helplessness of not being able to stop? These moments have come at bad times before. Sitting in class, during serious conversations, funerals, serine settings. It can be any number of things that set me off but mostly the mundane and the tedium of my surrounding weighing me down. Jokes and humor are a way of coping, my way of coping. I think I get out from my dad. I can remember him trying to make me smile or laugh at a funeral when I was in 7th grade. I'm sure there were times before - memories in long forgotten dark places in my mind. I'm making it sounds morbid. That's not my intention. I find life funny. Moving and inspirational. I probably find more to smile at on any normal day than most people do. I think talking to yourself helps. I know that's odd but try it. Soon you'll be smiling at what you are doing and then laughing. If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?!
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